Tongue in Cheek: A move in the right direction
Tongue in Cheek: A move in the right direction
Post written by Paragon Interiors   April 4, 2018

Assign a windowless office to the resident claustrophobic and see what happens. Unless, of course, the paramedics are on speed dial and the resident busybody who knows every paramedic in town (and then some) is able to launch herself at the speed dial button without getting tangled in the stray floor wires and a cluster of adaptors.

Space is an important consideration. If lack of space requires that all the desks are clumped together nursery school style, it wouldn’t be unreasonable to expect nursery school behaviour – chaos, tears and frayed tempers supported by the odd satisfying thump.

Fisticuffs within easy reach of one another would probably be quite entertaining, even great social media fodder but an unmitigated disaster. We advise a set up conducive to applying collective intelligence to problem-solving, sharing ideas, building relationships or improving co-operation, efficiencies, output and creativity.

It would also be necessary to nail your stapler to the desk and have your pen on a long piece of elastic with just enough tension to snap the resident airhead on the chops when you foil his/her attempt to “borrow” it. There’s always someone who loses every bit of office stationery and is utterly shameless about commandeering everyone else’s closely-guarded stash. You could, of course, lock it away if your drawer wasn’t being used to prop up the printer.

Geographic location should be manageable for everyone and offer sufficient parking for employees and visitors alike. Safety is also an important consideration, a place where staff are unlikely to trip over loose paving, fall into holes or be required to wear bullet-proof vests in order to reach the front door without incident. You won’t want loss of limb or life on your conscience.

Allow space for all the electronic and/or creative requirements needed to run your specific business. As far as we’re aware, no drawing board covered with construction plans, has ever been able to withstand the urgent clambering of someone in desperate need of the toilet. Also, check plug points in relation to the essential electronic requirements as a tangle of exposed cords and cables are not only unattractive but dangerous. You don’t want the current situation to trip the kettle and microwave at lunch hour or you may have to brace yourself for an ugly public spat peppered with hitherto unknown expletives.

News flash: Experts say that clutter in the workplace is counter-productive. De-cluttering is calming. You want to run a tidy, efficient office that pulses with life, professionalism and harmony. Thus, you are urged to prevent the dilemma of bins overflowing with discarded paper, pizza, damp tissues and limp lettuce leaves.

Think lighting. It’s a criminal offence to blind your employees with poor lighting or glare. It also impacts workflow and the Protection of the Lunch Box Act promulgated in 1949.

Now, agreeing on ambient temperature can be tricky. Seating people prone to self-combustion next to the office ice cube permanently swathed in multiple layers of wool, does not augur well. Check whether there are quiet, functioning air conditioners in the space and where they’re positioned.

Establish whether you require closed and/or open meeting spaces. A reception area, focus rooms, collaboration areas, informal spaces to relax during a break? A writing wall for ideas (one that outlaws ideas recommending what the bosses can do with themselves)?

Yes, we urge you to avoid the many unforeseen pitfalls of poor office planning. Paragon Interiors offers a brilliant starting point, click on this link to try out our Space Calculator which will help to assist you in identifying how much space you will need to match your specific requirements.